Sunday, April 29, 2007


today is the last Sunday of April.
i have no expectations for today, i've already been to church and taken a nap.
there is a bunch of praying i'll need to do for the week and keeping friends in mind who are applying for jobs or gearing up
for the conference.
yes, GOD: for people who hate church.
i'm looking forward to volunteering and for my brother and au pair friends to come and experience a conference put on by some "brothers and sisters" i've become close to over the past 2 years. i'm greatly encouraged at the thought of my friends from Streams coming down and doing more dream and confessional stuff.
what passes through my thoughts is whether or not i'll get enough rest to blitz through the craziness and have the right servant heart through out. will i see a need and be there to fill it? will the proper amount of people be there? (cause i have a feeling this is going to be huge).
so, goals this week:1. pray and meditate on God, let him reveil himself
2. go back to work and do it well and with a joyful heart
3. communicate with family and friends
4. rest when needed( todays nap was a good start;-)
5. look forward to seeing everyone on May 4-6!


Monday, April 16, 2007

the choice of a lifetime

things of God confuse me. Most folks get confused about why things happen from time to time. Such as the 39(at the moment) people dead at VT. i'm praying and sad for the loss of so many lives. i'm more grieved at the hate and self loathing that the gunman had to
do such a tragic Columbin-esque shooting.
People sometimes turn to the wrong things for help. there are a lot of start up, state funded, grass root or otherwise counciling for drug addicts, mentally ill, and outcasts in general.
but it comes down to the individual making the decision. CHOICES. the addict will always prefer to be high than deal with their kids, or their responsiblites. it takes strength to choose sobreity. the mentally ill, at least for me, would prefer to ride a mania than be boring and normal (but i relize the best thing is to fight the temptation), or for others it's the escapism into a world that isn't as judgemental, or just makes more sense than the cruel world.
there is hope. A lot of people make the right choices everyday. and choose to love not on their own power but on the basis of the grace that is given from Jesus. others find people to be yoke fellows and find that though it is difficult, there are people who shine for Christ. AA or NA are programs that encourage folks one day at a time to focus on making it through without the drugs.
Have you seen someone shine light in a dark place? i have, it's beautiful.
it has the power to know how to talk someone down from a ledge. to hug someone who otherwise wouldn't be touched.
but what i really want to see, is the beauty of the middle and upper class begin to show. i want those who are so scared to let someone see weakness, show that they have generosity for more than family, cars, and yoga. it's beautiful once these
folks shine! admitting there's a problem is the first step to recovery, and a closer step to the Truth, which i find abundant in the Bible.

Monday, April 2, 2007

not so misrepresented

there are some tv shows that i think kinda get mental illness. one in particular i'll mention quick is friday night lights.
there is a teenager that potrays not only the bipolar illness, but how it affects loved ones really well. it's a show that doesn't necessarily demonize the disease as i have seen it demonized on other shows.

i don't have much else to say, i think i'm crashing after a bit of the mainia. staying up til all hours on saturday does catch up with a person.